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Remember the old 90's SNL fake commercial for Bad Idea Jeans?
"I was going to use protection, but then I thought 'When will I ever be in Haiti again?'...
- Bad Idea"
Well, I had a Bad Idea myself yesterday. Following a long lunch with a few pops, I found myself in mid-Mississauga with a free hour to kill and feeling a little randy. Being a little to far from Allure and not really knowing the area, I did a quick google on my phone and found Tomken Bohemian Spa nearby.
I walked in and immediately was greeted by a very friendly, black woman named Kim. She pointed to 'Camilla' (heavy blond EE with bad hair) and said "she's up". Rather than turn around and walk out (which is what I should have done) I said "Can I take you?" and so Kim lead me into a room.
Being slightly buzzed and really wanting a massage (actual massage with a happy ending) instead of paying for a BS I was going to go for a Nude - until I let myself get upsold to a NR for $100.
First indications that this was not Allure: dimly lit room, completely dark shower with a shower head that sprayed in all directions, and decor that had not been updated or even mainained well in recent history.
Kim came back in and started to massage me. It wasn't half bad for the 5 minutes or so that she did my back but I really wanted some attention to the tons of knots back there and so I asked her to massage harder and she responded "I don't want to hurt you". Uhhh, how about rub a little harder and I'll let you know if its uncomfortable rather than just refuse. Then she undressed and moved to my legs and butt, which felt nice but lasted maybe 2-3 minutes. Some light teasing and then told me to switch places. I was not into it, as she was thicker than I like and I don't get off on fondling someone I'm not attracted to. She was more into it than I was at this point! As she started playing with junior I then told her that I wanted some more massage time before we got to the ending. We switched places again and she gave some more teasing and got me up on my hands and knees for a little stroking. Finally she told me to flip over and said I had about 2 minutes left. Now, I know that I had been in the room with her for a maximum of 15 minutes, but I didn't particularly enjoy the time so far, so I didn't argue. She gave me a very nice hand release (I let it go fast rather than try to max my time) and then, as she's about to clean me up with a towel, we hear the ringer go off in the front room and she runs out of the room stark naked to get the door! Now, if this had been the end of some killer BS with a hot, hard body girl that I was really into, I'd have been steamed that I was being left in-session so my attendant could go let in another customer. Instead, I was kind of glad to just shower up and get dressed!
She came back in to dress herself, complained about the owner and how they just took money from the place and never fixed anything or invested in the facilities, and then told me I looked nice and hadn't she seen me in there before? Certainly not I explained, I've never been here (and to myself I added 'absolutely, positively, never will return!').
I will give Kim this - she was very nice, could joke a little bit, and didn't overdo any fake moans or anything like that. However, physically she was not my cup of tea at all, and didn't exactly seem too concerned with listening to customer direction.
If you're into bigger women and dank, poorly maintained facilities, then by all means visit Tomken Bohemian. However, if you'd like the same price range and the exact opposite experience, never stray from the higher end spas (Allure, SRM).
At least I know to never, ever, stray again!
Room 5/10
Attendant Body 6/10
Massage 6/10
Attendant Face 6/10
Release 7/10
Service 4/10
"I was going to use protection, but then I thought 'When will I ever be in Haiti again?'...
- Bad Idea"
Well, I had a Bad Idea myself yesterday. Following a long lunch with a few pops, I found myself in mid-Mississauga with a free hour to kill and feeling a little randy. Being a little to far from Allure and not really knowing the area, I did a quick google on my phone and found Tomken Bohemian Spa nearby.
I walked in and immediately was greeted by a very friendly, black woman named Kim. She pointed to 'Camilla' (heavy blond EE with bad hair) and said "she's up". Rather than turn around and walk out (which is what I should have done) I said "Can I take you?" and so Kim lead me into a room.
Being slightly buzzed and really wanting a massage (actual massage with a happy ending) instead of paying for a BS I was going to go for a Nude - until I let myself get upsold to a NR for $100.
First indications that this was not Allure: dimly lit room, completely dark shower with a shower head that sprayed in all directions, and decor that had not been updated or even mainained well in recent history.
Kim came back in and started to massage me. It wasn't half bad for the 5 minutes or so that she did my back but I really wanted some attention to the tons of knots back there and so I asked her to massage harder and she responded "I don't want to hurt you". Uhhh, how about rub a little harder and I'll let you know if its uncomfortable rather than just refuse. Then she undressed and moved to my legs and butt, which felt nice but lasted maybe 2-3 minutes. Some light teasing and then told me to switch places. I was not into it, as she was thicker than I like and I don't get off on fondling someone I'm not attracted to. She was more into it than I was at this point! As she started playing with junior I then told her that I wanted some more massage time before we got to the ending. We switched places again and she gave some more teasing and got me up on my hands and knees for a little stroking. Finally she told me to flip over and said I had about 2 minutes left. Now, I know that I had been in the room with her for a maximum of 15 minutes, but I didn't particularly enjoy the time so far, so I didn't argue. She gave me a very nice hand release (I let it go fast rather than try to max my time) and then, as she's about to clean me up with a towel, we hear the ringer go off in the front room and she runs out of the room stark naked to get the door! Now, if this had been the end of some killer BS with a hot, hard body girl that I was really into, I'd have been steamed that I was being left in-session so my attendant could go let in another customer. Instead, I was kind of glad to just shower up and get dressed!
She came back in to dress herself, complained about the owner and how they just took money from the place and never fixed anything or invested in the facilities, and then told me I looked nice and hadn't she seen me in there before? Certainly not I explained, I've never been here (and to myself I added 'absolutely, positively, never will return!').
I will give Kim this - she was very nice, could joke a little bit, and didn't overdo any fake moans or anything like that. However, physically she was not my cup of tea at all, and didn't exactly seem too concerned with listening to customer direction.
If you're into bigger women and dank, poorly maintained facilities, then by all means visit Tomken Bohemian. However, if you'd like the same price range and the exact opposite experience, never stray from the higher end spas (Allure, SRM).
At least I know to never, ever, stray again!
Room 5/10
Attendant Body 6/10
Massage 6/10
Attendant Face 6/10
Release 7/10
Service 4/10
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