The V to tha izzzzzzal T to tha izzzzzzzine at Hands From Heaven......

David V

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Valentines Day came early me this yizzzzzear,yizzzzzzo. I finally got a chance to go see mah baby girl Sara V, in da place to be, as I chill in the waiting room with some french guy named Guy.


I could tell right off the bat that da S.V was diggin mah styles. About two minutes into our courtship of romance, da SV axed if I wuz a model.I wuz all like "dayum baby gurl,youz wants to break off a peice of me and have it fo dizzzzzzert."

SV went on to tell me dat she digs da way I verbalize. I tizzzold her dat if she wanted I could giver her a street nickname, so she can have sum street cred like myself. SV wuz like "hellzzzzzzz ya, give me a street name." So I told her from now on she'll be known as tha V to tha izzzzal T to tha izzzzzine. SV luved tha name and instantly got tizzzzurned on.

The session itself had mo fireworks den da 4th of July. SV was insatiable,yo.I wuz all like "chill,baby gurl,chill" but SV was all over me like a overweight inner city high school girl on a free hair weave gift certificate.

Da session eneded wit SV tellin me I needz to get into da modelling,and dat maybe da two of us could do sum sexy photo shoots together in da NYC.

V to tha izzzzal T to tha izzzine, when you read this, hit me up on muh 2 way,so they two of us can hook up tonight.
 
Did anyone understand a word of that? Someone has been going to the ricahrgl school of story telling.


TTFN
 
in other words, she's off da hizzle fo' shizzle
 
That was interesting.

Please let us know if the two of you are able to hook up tonight.
 
OK white guy translation:

I walked into H4H to see Sara.I met a nice guy named Guy in the waiting room.We chatted.When I went in for my session with Sara she told me that I was charming and a swell guy. She was impressed with my command of the english language. She asked if it would be proper to have a secound name that would appeal to the younger clients.I thought that it would be a grand idea and we worked together to create a new name that she liked. The massage was amazing. She treated me with alot of class and she was one hot mofo...ahhh I mean no detail was missed .She is one of the best IMHO.She complemented me on my looks and said that Mad Magazine was looking for a new mascot and that I should send in a photo. This girl is deffinitely a repeat and I have already sent in my photos
 
lolololololololololololololol

Phil,dat translation was pure jokes,yo.But on the realz, I'm definitely gonna take the Vizzzzzzal's advice and try and get into da modelling biz.

I remember back in da day when da Vizzzzzal first came on da scene, and some guys posted pics of her on the website onemodel.com. I'm gonna send some pics of myself to da peeps over there and see how many agents book photo shoots for me.

Wish me luck,bro's.
 
Funniest thing I've read in a long long time
 
yo that was funny phil, im surprised that massage parlous allow wiggers like pablo into their establishments. ROFL!!!!!!!
 
Yo dog, you must be confusin da Hands From Heaven wit da southern united states. And what's wit callin me wigger? Just becuz I'm white and talk like I'm frum Watts, you be hatin on me????? You gots ta increase the peace, shorty. We are all hip hop's children,no matter what our race be. So lets try and cut out the racial insults.

You feel me, mista KKK?
 
dammit Pablo thanks alot, you just made my ebonics class completely redundant with your rapid exceleration of street slang. now I'll never be hip!
 
Gramage,

You must go to York. Do you?

Dat's where I go. Yo dog, you should sign up for History of Black Music, next semester.
 
next semester I will join the fine tradition of York grads working at menial jobs desperate for a lotto win Pablo, and I felt out of place enough in the classes I've taken involving feminism, black music I'd be like Waldo.
 
Reading Pablo's summary gave me a headache and wish to give my thanks to Phil for the translation.
 
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  1. lemon_tree:
    ๐Ÿ’›๐Ÿ’ž a discreet entrance at 4155 Sheppard Avenue east, unit 201 ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’ฅMonday, ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’‹Carmen,๐Ÿ’‹ (Candy)๐Ÿ’‹ beautiful, dark hair to shoulder, tall and slim but busty, and does very relaxing treatment with over the top finish. โฃ ๐Ÿ’˜ ๐Ÿ“ž 647 348-2899๐Ÿ“ž
  2. Dreaminn:
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    ๐ŸŒธ We have 5 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ MALIYA, NISHA, AMANDA, ANGEL, PAYAL PEARL, AAVI, ANAYA ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
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    โคโฃ at 4385 Sheppard Avenue east, unit 5 ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŒน๐Ÿ‘„Monday, โค๐Ÿ‘„ Sophia,๐Ÿ‘„ 25 yrs, Oriental, 5'7", slim build, soft to medium treatment and very nice finish, full menu, very pretty. and ๐Ÿ’– Tammy, full body! ๐Ÿ”ด โ˜Ž๏ธ 647 352-1588โ˜Ž๏ธ
  5. bnwellness_wilson:
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  6. Endless Joy Spa:
    โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ[GRAND OPENING]โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ ๐Ÿ’žEndless Joy Spa๐Ÿ’ž ๐ŸŽ‡ (155 East Beaver Creek Rd Unit #8, Richmond Hill) 416-731-8565๐ŸŽ‡10am-2am, Young Slim Thai Janice, Young Sexy CBC Rachel. Slim Sexy Chinese Kiki, Tall Slim Sexy Chinese Kelly, Young Sexy Chinese Abie.
  7. gold__rose__spa:
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  8. Lulu1980:
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  18. bnwellness_wilson:
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  19. KSpa:
    SUNDAY at ๐Š ๐’๐๐€: JESSICA, YUMI & CINDY. Unit B6-4227 Sheppard Ave East Scarborough, ON (Just East of Midland Ave) โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿต๐Ÿฎ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿด โ˜Ž๏ธ JESSICA is 20, Chinese, 5โ€™3โ€ and 110 Lbs, sexy & good looking with 34C goodies to play with. YUMI is a young early twenties Japanese girl, about 5โ€™2โ€, medium build, natural chest, and a big sexy bum. Yumi is very versatile and skilled. CINDY is slim & pretty
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  21. Endless Joy Spa:
    โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ[GRAND OPENING]โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ ๐Ÿ’žEndless Joy Spa๐Ÿ’ž ๐ŸŽ‡ (155 East Beaver Creek Rd Unit #8, Richmond Hill) 416-731-8565๐ŸŽ‡10am-2am, Young Slim Thai Janice, Young Sexy CBC Rachel. Slim Sexy Chinese Kiki, Tall Slim Sexy Chinese Kelly, Young Sexy Chinese Abie.
  22. SunriseRH:
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  23. NewOriental:
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  24. ASPA:
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  25. HolidaySpa:
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  26. Moneylee:
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  27. Moneylee:
    Full season wellness center: Student pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Sonia ,young girl pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Connie , Young girl Big breasted saucy naughty Ella, Taiwan girl DD Boobs Thai deep massage lily,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary. 2560 Shepard ave Mississauga unit 1 .โ˜Ž๏ธ4379857899๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„
  28. ForeverWarden:
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  29. Dreaminn:
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  30. Red Rose Spa:
    ๐ŸŒธ We have 5 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ AAVI, SARIKA, PAYAL PEARL, NINA, MALIYA, NISHA, NIMRAT, MONIKA, KIRAN ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
  31. Sparkling Spa:
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  33. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix Blossom spa โ™จ๏ธโ™จ๏ธโ™จ๏ธ table shower body scrub ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘We have 3 beautiful young girls working today, young and lovely Jessica and coco Specialising in table shower body scrub massages and offering deep massages Cici๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—5124 Dundas St W Etobicoke.Please call โ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366 to book and Walk in the back door there is plenty of parking available
  34. Endless Joy Spa:
    โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ[GRAND OPENING]โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ ๐Ÿ’žEndless Joy Spa๐Ÿ’ž ๐ŸŽ‡ (155 East Beaver Creek Rd Unit #8, Richmond Hill) 416-731-8565๐ŸŽ‡10am-2am, Young Curvy Sexy Latina Karen, Young Sexy CBC Rachel. Slim Sexy Chinese Kiki, Tall Slim Sexy Chinese Kelly, Young Sexy Chinese Abie.
  35. tick:
    best massage attendant
  36. Red Rose Spa:
    ๐ŸŒธ We have 5 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ AAVI, SARIKA, PAYAL PEARL, NINA, MALIYA, NISHA, NIMRAT, MONIKA, KIRAN ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
  37. SpringGreen.:
    Spring Green Spa - 72 Gerrard St W. 2/Fl - 647-891-06Today we have 5 girls on Saturday๏ผš Jennifer - CBC girl with large breasts and a nice booty to compliment her fun services Vicky - cute spinner with a slim frame and services Sandy -... ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹new girl Linda๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹
  38. Sparkling Spa:
    โšก๏ธ๐ŸŒŸSPARKLING SPAโšก๏ธ๐ŸŒŸ โœ…50 Lockridge Ave Unit 8โœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒMarkham, ON L3R 8X4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ(905) 604-8186 Spa Land Lineโ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ(437) 446-6688 NEW Spa Cell Phoneโ˜Ž๏ธ (West of Warden & 16th Ave) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅSUPERSTAR SERVICE QUEENS AVAILABLE AT SPARKLING SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ”ฅSEXY NEW YOUNG GIRLS ALWAYS WORKING - Todayโ€™s Schedule isโ€ฆ๐Ÿ”ฅ Foxy -๐Ÿ”ฅYour new addiction at Sparkling Spa! A tall 5โ€™7โ€ sexy Korean girl with a wild ro
  39. Endless Joy Spa:
    โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ[GRAND OPENING]โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ ๐Ÿ’žEndless Joy Spa๐Ÿ’ž ๐ŸŽ‡ (155 East Beaver Creek Rd Unit #8, Richmond Hill) 416-731-8565๐ŸŽ‡10am-2am, Young Curvy Sexy Latina Karen, Young Sexy CBC Rachel. Slim Sexy Chinese Kiki, Tall Slim Sexy Chinese Kelly, Young Sexy Chinese Abie.
  40. Jennyโ€™s Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’JENNYโ€™S SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…5170 DUNDAS STREET WESTโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ(647-893-5196)โ˜Ž๏ธCall or Text โ˜Ž๏ธ(437-888-3759)โ˜Ž๏ธCall Only (ETOBICOKE) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…GRAND OPENING๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅEXCELLENT MASSAGE + SERVICE QUEENS NOW AVAILABLE AT JENNYโ€™S SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ”ฅTWO BEAUTIFUL NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ’ฏREAL PICTURES OF ATTENDANTS๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ”ฅTODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: Apple๐Ÿ˜˜ - Brand new girl from Taiwan just ar
  41. Moneylee:
    All season wellness center : New Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Monica ,Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Wendy ,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament Lala,Young beautiful face sexy body and good deep massage Maggie, Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Sherry ,๐Ÿ  address: #5-30 Rambler dr Brampton ,Ontario L6W 1E2โ˜Ž๏ธ4376655510 ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…
  42. Moneylee:
    Full season Wellness center: New Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Lucky, Student big boobs buttocks Vicky ,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Anjoo , young girl pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Linda ,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary. ๐Ÿ  2560 Shepard ave Mississauga unit 1 โ˜Ž๏ธ 4379857899 ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿˆต๏ธ
  43. Annie Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ANNIE SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLEโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒSCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ(647) 891-9688โ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ(416) 291-8879โ˜Ž๏ธ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ”ฅGORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: ๐Ÿ”ฅ Ivy โค๏ธ is new girl in our branch, shy and sweet but also very vocal and needy, she demands your happiness and satisfaction. Slim body, supple soft breasts with long nipples and a toned bum bum will have you intoxicated by Ivyโ€™s good looks
  44. Lily Spa:
    โค๏ธ SANA, NINA and KK are here today for your massage needs โค๏ธ Lily Spa โค๏ธ 2190 McNicoll โค๏ธ Scarborough โค๏ธ M1V 5M2 โค๏ธ (647) 531-8288 โค๏ธ
  45. KSpa:
    SATURDAY at ๐Š ๐’๐๐€: CICI, HELEN, YOYO & CINDY. Unit B6-4227 Sheppard Ave East Scarborough, ON (Just East of Midland Ave) โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿต๐Ÿฎ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿด โ˜Ž๏ธ CICI is a slim 110 Lbs & pretty 23 years โ€œMust Tryโ€ honey, with all menus available. HELEN stands 5โ€™3โ€ & weighs 110 Lbs, with nice 34D pillows to comfort you. YOYO is JAPANESE, 21 Yrs, 5โ€™2โ€ & 115 Lbs, with a nice big ass & great service.
  46. SugarLoveSpa:
    Saturday at Sugar Love Spa: Eva, Lily, Sunny & Tiffany. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York, ON โ˜Ž 437-365-2688 โ˜Ž EVA is a NEW beautiful White/Asian mix girl, 5โ€™1โ€, 36C, very friendly, sexy and interesting. LILY is NEW TODAY. SUNNY is NEW TODAY. TIFFANY is an amazing slim petite doll with natural 34C melons, slim waist, & a cute little booty
  47. Red Rose Spa:
    ๐ŸŒธ We have 5 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ AAVI, SARIKA, PAYAL PEARL, NINA, MALIYA, NISHA, NIMRAT, MONIKA, KIRAN ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
  48. Dreaminn:
    SATURDAY at ๐Ÿ’ญ๐——๐—ฅ๐—˜๐—”๐—  ๐—œ๐—ก๐—ก ๐—ช๐—˜๐—Ÿ๐—Ÿ๐—ก๐—˜๐—ฆ๐—ฆ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”๐Ÿ’ญ: AMY, ELSA, EVA. 10225 Yonge St (North of Major Mackenzie), Richmond Hill, ON โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต๐Ÿด๐Ÿฏ โ˜Ž๏ธ AMY is a sweet and friendly Chinese vixen, 158Cms, 115Lbs, with C Cups, very excitable and fun. ELSA is slim, petite & very pretty student, early 20โ€™s about 5โ€™2โ€ and 105 Lbs. Elsa has an innocent look about her, but she can drive you wild with pleasure
  49. Birchmount&14th:
    SATURDAY at ๐๐ˆ๐‘๐‚๐‡๐Œ๐Ž๐”๐๐“ & ๐Ÿ๐Ÿ’๐ญ๐ก: JESSIE & *SK๐—ฌ๐—Ÿ๐—”๐—ฅ* Birchmount Rd & 14th Ave., Markham, ON. Call or Text for details and appointment. โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ๐Ÿฐ โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐—๐—˜๐—ฆ๐—ฆ๐—œ๐—˜ is a slim and very sexy Asian girl with skills of the highest degree. *๐—ฆ๐—ž๐—ฌ๐—Ÿ๐—”๐—ฅ* has returned on Saturdays! She is a superstar & very well known for her skills.๐Ÿ˜ƒ We are open 24 Hours daily. We have clean rooms & free parking
  50. SunriseRH:
    SATURDAY at ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—ก๐—ฅ๐—œ๐—ฆ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”: SUMMER & TIANA. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 27, Richmond Hill, on โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฑ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿด๐Ÿฒ โ˜Ž๏ธ SUMMER is an incredibly sweet Asian babe, 5โ€™3โ€ with a captivating 36D-28-39 figure, weighing 108 pounds. Summer has very good massage & services. TIANA is a sexy Jamaican girl, 5โ€™6โ€ & 120Lbs, possessing 36DD-28-39 assets to drive you crazy.
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